14 Valentines...

I missed my first 3 days for 14 valentines (mostly because if you asked me for the past week and a half, I couldn't tell you what day it was) but the topics were really important to me so I'm still say a few things on them here.

Feb 1: Body issues.

To say that every woman has body issues is the biggest understatement that I have ever heard. It seems that we're never happy with ourselves and when we are for a few seconds that the most important people choose those moment to comment on us. The range from too fat to too skinny, too short to too tall, too flat chested to too "blessed" (what? you thought that I was going to say boobilious?), too anything to too anything else has driven me crazy.

The best example I can give of... all of the above really, is in my house. My sister is beautiful. Beyond so. She has been offered modeling gigs and other things in that vain but she has no interest in the entertainment business. Despite all of this, she refuses to wear tight tops and shorts skirts or shorts. Why? Two reasons. First, her legs have scars from her eczema. It annoys her to no end and she has tried almost every lotion under the sun to minimize appearance. The second is that according to her, she needs to tone her stomach. Now my family doesn't help at all. They joke around in fun and I don't think that it's completely intentional but they have seen that it makes her get upset (did I mention that she was 16 and slightly more hormonal than any teenage I have come across? No? She is.). But it's what they do- I really should know.

Since I went to high school, all of a sudden it appears to be okay to point that I have a bigger chest than normal. By anyone. Not to mention that I've always been overweight so such things have led to commentary on that. Fun. With my family, it went a step further. For instance, if my mother asks if I want to have surgery one more time then I will scream. If my grandmother asks me to lose weight so I can marry a cute boy, I will...well I'd do nothing because that's my Lita. I might end up pissed for the rest of the day. If I get another pamphlet from my uncle on ways to lose weight then I might slash someone with it. Maybe. My other temptation involves those papers and making a human blow torch so yeah.

It has become a fight to get up, look in the mirror and say that I look cute. And most of those days by the time I get to the door, either my family,my friends (both inadvertently or my television screen has been there to say "no you're not." I don't understand the reasons and to be honest, I don't want to. I want to be able to hang out with my friends with all of us eying someone else in the group and wanting their figure. I want people to drop the emphasis on "plus" in plus-size. I want the bullcrap to stop. End of story.


I'm actually going to comment on the other two topics (sexuality and sexual assault) in tomorrow's post.

La la blah

I went back and forth on the idea of doing a "blog". Not that I don't have an LJ already and therefore indulge in living in the age of the geek but that was "another" me in a sense. Other than the few close friends that I've made, anyone could have stumbled on my journal and forget it two seconds later because it was just another fandom thing and I'm not a BNF. Which was really cool and I like it that way. This journal is more or less my life when I'm not screaming for a beta because "I entered a big-bang and have NaNoWriMo and then realized it was writer sucide and by the way, does any one know off the bat, the layout of the Bronze or the best way to conceal a poly-carbon dagger." Do not mock me- this has happened.

Plus, I started my mission101 list. Which I decided to post on this (though if you found this through my LJ then I'll still give monthly updates) because it's more personal and free from all the drama that comes from being online to escape real life drama. Which is rather depressing when you think about the world that we've created there and all that jazz. *waves off *

About Me:

I hate doing "about me" stuff. Why the hell do I have to look over my life and pick the highlights just to make my life something you can summerize in five seconds or less.

I'm addicted to music. Seriously. If it's not on a speaker, then it's in my head. At all times. 2480 songs on itunes and those aren't even counting the albums that I didn't fully load yet.

I might have a sugar-rush problem.

I definitely have a attention span problem.

I adore reading.

I don't know how I used to funtion without The Sims (I'm not linking because I assume you all know what it is.)

I am an extremely social person who, for the most part, despises people. I can't help it. I find myself often surrounded by morons.

In my head, 95% of things relate back to Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Don't worry- even I know that that's weird. But Joss is awesome (my issues with him concerning certain social and moral issues aside).

I can honestly say that my obsessions have saved my life.







That's all for now.